If you’ve been following my blog….at all, you know that I use a lot of words. I’m a perspective girl, meaning that I like to have the whole picture to think and process – so I talk that way too when I’m explaining things close to my heart.
Since I’m ‘home’ (Ohio) & talking to people about Haiti, I’m following this same pattern in real conversation all of the time. In giving perspective, I go off on rabbit trails often – because there are so many side conversations to better explain a culture that I know you just can’t picture with the story I am telling. Pictures, the best book, and the greatest storyteller in the world all coming together would still just paint a one dimensional picture of a piece of Haiti, poverty, international missions, God’s heart for the world, what I’ve learned about prayer, the families I know…you get it.
All that to say, life has taken a bit of a rabbit trail the past week. Plans went where they were planned, but then other roads intersected them and took us off track. I had a planned, elective surgery in each of my eyes and the second eye had complications overnight that sent me into a full day of emergency procedures. Plans have changed, life has slowed down, and life has gone down it’s own rabbit trail before I get back to where I was headed.
I could describe the changed plans, the relationship I now have with the surgery center, the encouragement from others or the sacrifice of time in the precious few months I have in America. You’ve probably noticed my lack of posts, when I was so sure I’d be pumping them out. But we’re not going on those trails today, although I’d love to talk about what Jesus has taught me about being still and being filled – we’re focusing on a simpler idea today.
When plans change, you can either embrace it or …not. This is both external and internal, the five year old who doesn’t want to leave yet who is screaming in your arms and your polite smile as you think about how much better this weekend would be if you were spending it where you planned instead of your family’s get together that you were told about last minute.
I’m amazed at how “over and above” it is to be positive in a situation that doesn’t go your way in our society.
I’m ashamed at how there is a weekend coming up that isn’t something I planned, and I keep retreating to a selfish heart that wants to rest in frustration and self-centeredness over two days of my life. And I know that if I rest in this, of course those two days will be miserable.
Every rabbit trail is a road that you wouldn’t have the chance to normally travel. New people, situations, challenges to either grow in or fight through in resistance to think outside of yourself. When we embrace this, the road comes alive – scenery, stops, a joy for the ride we get to be a part of.
And then there’s the other side. A waste of gas. Maybe even a flat tire, leaving worse than you started.
Life is so much better when we aren’t grumpy.
(I’ve gotta admit it’s funny that I’m writing this on the American side of things. Haiti, as well as other hot climate cultures, is known for changed planes, hours of delays, and rabbit trails on a daily basis. It’s in Ohio that there’s a different perspective, though.)
(Oh, and I am healing! Praying for my eye to constrict as it may be damaged permanently without our Healer’s intervention. Loving the long term relationship building with the office!)
I am currently in Ohio as I search for partners in my five year commitment to Haiti. Please e-mail me at email@example.com or check out my “Partner With Me” page if you feel a tug that you can’t shake. I have $29,000 a year to raise (Already down to 20.000 – God both sends and provides!) Events and products from Haitian artisans can be found at https://www.facebook.com/felaviansanm